A recent study from the "Down Unda Mate" research facility in Syndey Australia has shown definitively that a blind kangaroo had a better understanding of the game of basketball than Portland Trailblazers coach Nate McMillan.
The study involved giving a basketball to a blindfolded kangaroo, then having him shoot the ball at a hoop anytime he felt a game time situation deserved a substitution. Remarkably the kangaroo guessed right about 10% of the time which is substantially higher than anything Nate McMillan has ever been able to achieve. It is also worth noting that the kangaroo had a higher shooting percentage than that of any Trailblazers' player over the last week.
When asked for comment on the study's findings Coach McMillan replied "I think those who did the study need to work harder, they're obviously not giving their all into the research. I think they should square their shoulders & contain the kangaroo better." When pressed further that he was simply dodging the question he firmly placed both hands on his hips & looked at us sternly until we got bored & left the press conference.
Coach McMillan may have some justifiable beef with the study as it's legitimacy has been brought into question over concern that the kangaroo was really just former point guard crash test dummy Patty Mills inside of a kangaroo costume. While Patty Mills does own a kangaroo costume & was involved in the famous incident while trying out for a Chinese team where black market poachers thought he was a real kangaroo & tried to harvest his gall bladder to make penis enhancing potions, it has not been proven that he was involved in the study in any way.
The study just adds more fuel to the raging debate going on regarding Nate McMillan's fitness to coach. For those who dislike him the study is more proof that Portland needs a change of coach. Meanwhile his supporters continue to suggest that the study was biased & erred in using a kangaroo which arguably has the highest basketball IQ of all marsupials & that Nate would definitely have beaten a Koala or a Wombat.
